Wildlife

Annoying Bloody Birds

There’s a really annoying bird near my house that calls all day and night. I’ve been hearing it for years, but have only recently seen the culprit. It’s a Common Koel, a member of the cuckoo family, and it has a call that makes you want to throttle the bloody thing. Sure, it sounds cute when you hear it the first time, but the novelty wears pretty thin when you hear it all through the night for months on end.

When seen, the male Common Koel is easily identified by its entirely glossy black plumage, tinged with blue and green, and striking red eye. The female has glossed brown upperparts, heavily spotted with white, and a black crown. The underparts are generally buff-cream with numerous fine black bars. Young birds resemble the adult female, but have considerably more buff and a dark eye. The Common Koel is 39 to 46 cm in length, and is a member of the cuckoo family. Adults are rather shy and they are heard much more than seen. The male Common Koel advertises its presence by a loud ascending whistle coo-ee or ko-el, monotonously repeated; the call of the female is a repetitive wook-wook-wook. Males often call throughout the day and well into the night.

No shit. Little bastards.

I’ve probably seen the females before and mistaken them for Wattle Birds — which make far better neighbours.

Photo: common koel 1, originally uploaded by Jim Bendon

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108 Comments


  1. sbszine

    19 December 2003 at 9.57 am

    This is the fucking thing that kept me up from 3 to 5 am on Thursday night.
    Despite being a vegan and animal lover, I would happy bite the head off the thing if I ever caught it.

    Reply

  2. Jason Poly

    29 January 2004 at 10.56 am

    We got one living in our gum tree, being taken care of by a magpie. Ive only just found out it was a cole, and I guess its a female because it is grey with brown feathers. The bloody thing will not shutup only when it gets fed. I hope the thing isnt too territorial and start laying it legs around the street because anymore of these birds and I will go nuts.

    Reply

  3. Serg

    30 September 2004 at 1.27 pm

    Oh man, do I fucking hate this bird! I’ve been hearing it from Ocrober to March for the past 3 years. It’s killing my life. I have to sleep with headphones on too block the noise out. I think I’m gonna buy a slug gun and take it out, once and for all! To the message before [Jason Poly] I read that Koel only lays one egg, raises it and flys it back to Indonesia or somewhere? So if you can find the egg, bingo! Instead of hearing the kooo-eeee in the morning you’ll be hearing the sizzle of fried Koel egg! sweet! Sorry I forgot you are a vegan. Maybe I’ll just let my cat have its way with it…

    Reply

  4. Lucy

    6 November 2004 at 5.05 pm

    I was woken up at pretty much at exactly 4am every morning for about 2 months last year because of this bird. Its call just really gets to me.. must be the pitch of it or something, i ended up getting ear plugs!

    Reply

  5. Brad Hughes

    28 January 2005 at 10.03 am

    I just google’d for “annoying bird noises” and this is the little bastard I’ve been looking for. I have heaps of them near my house and they are driving me crazy. Anyone got a slug gun?!?!?

    Reply

  6. birdbegone

    7 February 2005 at 2.53 am

    Purchase an Eagle or a Osprey windsock bird. These birds recognize them as a bird of prey. Night or Day, if there is a breeze the birds will move on. Nests dissappear also becasue they never come back.
    [Advertising link removed, you can find your own kite or tethered bird of prey from a local retailer]

    Reply

  7. CD

    9 March 2005 at 4.26 am

    R u sure that bird on the right of your picture is not a reed bunting?My bird book says it is.Well whatever its called its driving me mad!!Hlp how can we get rid of these birds.Im tryin to study and cant concentrate.It wakes me up at 6.30am every day.Last yr it was in my garden from march til august.Ah!!Icant go through it again!I’ve a thesis to write this summer

    Reply

  8. CD

    9 March 2005 at 4.31 am

    AH!! I can even hear him while I type! Somebody help me before I do something I seriously regret.Like with a gun! I really like animals and birds in general.But not this stupid bird who’s driving me mad and ruining my life.Normal birds sing and its a pleasant addition to any garden.This thing doesn’t sing it just squaks non stop all day every day.I don’t know how it doesn’t lose its voice

    Reply

  9. Red Wolf

    9 March 2005 at 9.24 am

    The picture came from Birds Australia, but it’s possible it goes by a different name in your area.
    It’s the little black bastard I’ve seen, so I can confirm that it is the culprit.
    And if a Reed Bunting is a cuckoo, it probably is related. Take slingshot to it, encouraging the things to breed is never a good idea for your sanity

    Reply

  10. Josh

    17 April 2005 at 6.54 pm

    Does a version of this thing live in North America? There’s something that’s been driving me CRAZY for the last two months at my new apartment here in Los Angeles. It sounds like the loud Tweet-Tweet-Tweeting on the soundtrack, but I don’t hear anything like the lower warble in the background. Also, it seems able to imitate car alarms from time to time, which is just driving me up the WALL. My girlfriend won’t even stay here when she has to work the next day, because the birds keep her up all night!

    Reply

  11. Red Wolf

    17 April 2005 at 7.59 pm

    It’s a cuckoo, so you may be hearing something else from the family.
    The Australian ones don’t imitate car alarms, but black birds in the UK have been caught at it

    Reply

  12. josh

    3 June 2005 at 12.01 pm

    We just hung up old CD’s. They reflect back and forth. It was erie. Just as we hung the first one, all the birds stoped.

    Reply

  13. Brad

    26 August 2005 at 9.38 am

    These little c%^nts are ruling my life at the moment. As soon as the sun shows it’s face (5:00am), they start. And they ALWAYS sit in a tree about 20 meters from my window. I am so tired, they just never let up. Its the most annoying constant squawk I have ever heard. I ran out this morning and threw a shoe into the tree, and a) hurt my shoulder thowing it, and b) only stopped them for about 10 seconds.
    Today, I am buying a slug gun. I found one for sale for $250 from a guy at the pub I drink at. Accurate to 100 meters, scope/sight. These birds days are numbers!
    As big kev would say, im excited. I am going to get an unbelievable amount of satisfaction watching a slug enter there arse hole at 100 meters / second 🙂

    Reply

    • Cil

      22 October 2014 at 5.11 am

      OMG I pissed myself when I read your comment.. This devil bird that’s squawking its cunt out til it almost chokes itself the death, drives me insane EVERY year. I swear if I had a gun I’d loose my shit & go on a bird killing rampage. The neighbours must think I’m insane running around the street with a Shang eye.. I honestly have no idea how it’s not bothering anyone else. Thanks for the laugh.. Good to know I’m not the only insane person

      Reply

      • TIRED AUSSIE

        23 October 2014 at 6.37 am

        2 WORDS PEOPLE. *AUTOMATIC SPRAY* CITRUS, NOT RARE SCENTS EBONY AND MADAGASCAN VANILLA BECAUSE THEN THE CUNT FEELS MORE RELAXED AND SINGS EVEN LOUDER. I AM NOT JOKEING ABOUT THAT. I RAN OUT OF THE CITRUS SO PUT MY VERY SPECIAL ONE IN AND YEP THE CUNT LOVES IT. DONT EVEN MISS A BEAT WHEN IT SPRAYS UNLIKE THE CITRUS. SUCKS IT UP AND SINGS ON, SO, THE M T CANS I HAV ON HAND HAD TO GET THROWN THIS A.M AFTER THE BASTARD WOKE ME UP.. WHEN DOES THE SEASON END? NEVER HAD THIS B4. NOW I CAN BARELY STAND ANY FUCKEN BIRD SINGN

        Reply

  14. Lyndon

    14 September 2005 at 10.07 am

    I’d like to see one of you eat your fallen prey. It seems like a fitting end.

    Reply

  15. Kerry

    29 September 2005 at 10.34 am

    Although I am sorry for you all, I am really glad to hear I am not the only one with this bloody bird problem. I’ve been searching for a site about this. My husband and I are getting very cranky from lack of sleep. I used to think it started at 4am or 5am, but now it’s all night. It’s amazing how just a noise like this can ruin your life at home, I’m hating coming home to this every night. It’s just across the road from us and as soon as I get home from work and hear it, I get depressed knowing what my night is going to be like – no sleep! I love birds, but I really hate this one. We want to shoot it too, but we can’t see it, it’s in this really tall leafy tree, right at the top I think. I will let you know if we are successful in getting rid of it. I’ll try the CDs but where do you put them? The tree is so big. Maybe windchimes in the tree? I would rather shoot it. I’ve lost any compassion for it I’m afraid.

    Reply

  16. Todd Crooks

    4 October 2005 at 4.07 pm

    This bloddy thing woke me up this morning at 4:30am. I can handle most birds but this one takes the cake!!
    I’m gunna rip out its vocal chords and shove em its arse when I hear it again, either that or chop down the tree with an axe!!
    Fucking things!

    Reply

  17. Chook

    16 October 2005 at 6.29 am

    It’s now 6:30 on a Sunday morning. What normal person wakes up at that time on the weekend. I’ve been on the roof of my garage in underpants throwing rocks at tree behind my house since 5am. What normal person does that! Yes, a person with a Koel in his tree not 20 metres from the bed. I am sure it knows it is pissing me off, the sounds are getting more strained as the morning goes on, it’s just trying to get louder and more annoying. The gun trick immediately springs to mind, and I am looking to build a good sling shot, but I like the idea of the cd’s, so I’ll be climbing this things today with whatever I can find. Mind you, a have found the only time that I get some piece from it is when it moves to the tree across the road (making it only a bit quieter but tolerable). I’ll probably end up climbing all the trees in the neighbourhood.

    Reply

  18. Rupert

    16 October 2005 at 7.57 pm

    This bird has been pissing me off since the day it arrived and set up just 10 metres from where I sleep. It just never shuts up.
    I need to know where to get an Air rifle/slug gun!!!

    Reply

  19. Bird

    18 October 2005 at 12.41 pm

    I have had this for about a week now and it is driving me and my poor pregnant wife around the bend! I’m sure at about 4.30am today I heard an air rifle go off, was that you Rupert? What area are you in? I closed all our windows slept in the front of the house and still could hear the damn thing, how loud are these stupid f’ing birds!! I’m hoping that whoever had the air rifle last night is out again tonight!

    Reply

  20. TheOtherBird

    18 October 2005 at 1.45 pm

    Ah yes – I have one of these annoying little s$%Ts in my yard at the moment. Maybe I can wire up the whole f$%^ing gum tree so it’s ass fries next time it lands there..

    Reply

  21. Red Wolf

    18 October 2005 at 7.19 pm

    My problems with the Koel were solved when the neighbours had the tree removed. A rather dratsic action to take, but it did have a borer infestation and the neighbours were worried it was going to take out their daughter’s room one night.
    I get a peaceful night’s sleep and the Koel has moved to another tree, fortunately out of earshot when I’m inside

    Reply

  22. Chook

    19 October 2005 at 7.30 am

    Well I’m pleased to say that I’ve had moderate success (refer to rant above). I climbed the tree out the back and put up several aluminium foil mobiles (going off the cd idea). I’m about 6ft short of the top of the tree (and where the bird sits) but for me, looking down on the birds flying past, it was more than high enough. Did it work? kind of. I probably really need to go higher up the tree however, previously the bird would sit in the same position all day. First day with the mobiles it did not come back, second it came back a couple of times but I had left the rope I used to climb the tree in position. Pulling the rope a few times didn’t shake the tree, but was enough to make the bird fly away. Since Monday I’ve only heard it a couple of times in my tree, but it only stayed for 5 minutes then buggered off to another tree – just across the road, but a tolerable distance. At the moment this is enough for me… Hope this helps anyone else.

    Reply

  23. BirdMuncher

    24 October 2005 at 11.55 am

    I am so happy for you that you’ve found your solution and happy for me that I can try the same method.
    I’ve been searching the web all morning trying to identify the bird making the excruciating noise at 4am in the morning and waking me up at night.
    But now I hear these OTHER birds flying around in the morning, making the most annoying squawk I’ve ever heard. I thought they were parrots, but they had grey feathers and slender bodies. They fly very fast in flocks of about 5 and usually do their squawking thing at dusk and early morning as well.
    Anyone out there know what these are????

    Reply

  24. Bleary-eyed

    26 October 2005 at 10.02 pm

    Having been a resident of Sydney for all my life, I remember these little bastards keeping me awake ever since I can remember! For some reason, their usual and most annoying call in the early hours is the “wurruu” one found here.
    This is certainly the sound of the one that’s taken up in the tree outside my window (a monster tree that is too big to climb up and hang things in).

    Reply

  25. Dan

    31 October 2005 at 2.02 pm

    We’ve had one here for the last two days in the tree in my neighbours yard, no one lives in the house though. I’ve been trying to study for my hsc exams, doors shut with music up loud so i can drown the noise of this fucking bird out. It’s so painful. It started at about 3 am this morning, and has been going since. If it doesn’t piss off in a few days im going to have to resort to throwing rocks or something. The noise it makes is nice but extremely repetitive and piercing. If its there for much longer i think the slug gun idea is excellent, unless i can find any other solutions.

    Reply

  26. Brad

    7 November 2005 at 6.42 pm

    noise it makes is nice but extremely repetitive and piercing.
    Your off your guts. It’s not nice at all. It’s fucking awful.

    Reply

  27. BirdMuncher

    15 November 2005 at 10.20 am

    BlearyEyed – YES! I’ve also found out the annoying screeching bird through the website you posted. It’s an annoying cuckoo thing: Channel-billed Cuckoo

    Reply

  28. Red Wolf

    15 November 2005 at 10.29 am

    The Channel-billed Cuckoo is different to the Common Koel. While both have annoying cuckoo habits, the Koel is far more annoying

    Reply

  29. Rex and Kerko

    15 November 2005 at 7.07 pm

    All night and half the day..fucking poofter of a thing !!!in a 2 klm radius of neighbours ,everyone i know around me WILL NOT MIND if i kill the useless fucking feather flapping BASTARD,surely the greenies would not miss a couple of em ???????????????????

    Reply

    • TIRED AUSSIE

      14 October 2014 at 5.31 am

      YOURS WAS THE 1ST COMMENT I READ ABOUT THIS FUCKEN BIRD. I LAUGHED SO MUCH I 4GOT ABOUT IT 4 A MINUTE. I HAVE TRIED COILS AND SPRAYS AND SPONGE FULL OF EUCALYPTUS BUT THE LITTLE CUNT JUST LAPS IT UP. TRAUMATIC. BEEN GOING TO TRY THE CD IDEA. 2NITES THE NITE. THERE JUST EVERYWHERE. GET RID OF ONE IN THE CLOSEST TREE AND U CAN HEAR A DOZEN MORE OF THE BASTARDS. NEED SLEEP IN AUSTRALIA!!!

      Reply

  30. BirdMuncher

    16 November 2005 at 8.53 am

    Red Wolf,
    I was referring to another bird in my backyard making another screeching annoying noise (the Channel billed Cuckoo) – see a few posts up. Imagine waking up to the Koel AND bloody Cuckoo!!!

    Reply

  31. Brad

    19 November 2005 at 4.31 am

    This is ridiculous. It’s now 4:30am, I have been up since 2:54am, when a male koel in a tree 20 meters from my bedroom window has again been calleing persistently! It’s too dark for me to shoot at. I do have a slug gun but I have found that even during the day, I can’t get a clear shot away at these iillusive pricks. It is calling 2 seconds apart, for just on almost 2 hours solid. I am so pissed off at these birds, what can I possibly do to get rid of them.
    Tired,
    Brad

    Reply

  32. Brad

    19 November 2005 at 4.59 am

    I just read that when these birds migrate north for the winter, they fly in one large flock, which is so big it covers several suburbs.
    Who wants to chuck in and hire a helicopter, and we’ll fly through and mince the lot of them? God I’d love to do that, such is my hate for this species!! LOL

    Reply

  33. Samantha Galea

    22 November 2005 at 9.57 am

    I live in country NSW and the bloody thing starts at about 5.30 then stops at about 09.30 (when I am at work) and then starts again at 2.00pm that afternoon. I am going CRAZY!!!!! I am pregnant and my 4yr old daughter wakes in the night because of the bloody bird. I really am going insane. My daughter woke up the other night and threw a tantrum and woke it at 3.00am. Someone said it migrates back to Indonesia – does that mean that it carries the bloody bird flu as well??!!!?? HELP!!!! I am going to ring the ranger and he can shoot the bastard. My luck I would miss and I would shoot a neighbour!

    Reply

  34. Brad

    27 November 2005 at 10.18 pm

    I think I’ve found the solution!
    I was reading this (P3 P7830 Sonic Bird Chaser). It’s a device that emits the sounds of birds of prey (owls, hawks, eagles etc). So I downloaded a few MP3’s of different birds of prey, and I have been playing them whenever I hear the coel around my place. And it works! They disappear immediately!
    The Wedge Tailed Eagle sound (google it) seems to work best. Soon as i play it through my stereo, every bird in the area goes silent!

    Reply

  35. JEN

    13 December 2005 at 1.33 pm

    OH MY GOD – I thought i was the only freak yelling out my window at 4am in the morning…..This bird has made me go crazy, i bought ear plugs but because i have pushed them so deep into my ear and created an ear infection, i cant wear them anymore (i could hear the bird through them anyhow) My husband thought i was losing it at first, no he is aware of the sounds and he cant handle it….The bird sits in a tree next door to me and i cant get to the tree, i have a big balcony, can i hang something off that? A plastic Eagle or Owl? I hope these bastards can see it at night….When i am lying in my bed at night trying to sleep all i think about is how happy i would be if i killed and tortured it…i know that sounds bad but losing sleep to an indonesian bird shits me to tears….Oh and not to mention coming home from work wanted peace and quiet, then the bastard comes back at 6pm and squawks, so i squawk back at it, i will try anything to shut the fucker up!

    Reply

  36. Pez

    15 December 2005 at 2.06 pm

    This nice looking black bird with a red eye is going down. Every morning for the last month this little prick and his mates have woken me at 5am. My first action will be a shot of water from the hose, if this doesnt work the slug gun comes out. I like the sound they make when they are off in the distance but when he sits in the tree outside my bedroom window it pisses me off. What makes it worse is the kids in the neighbourhood are starting to immitate this liitle prick. SHIT!! If war is what this little prick wants, its war that he will get. P.S. I like birds but not ones that wake me at the crack of dawn. That why I have an alarm clock.

    Reply

  37. Peter Shooter

    11 February 2006 at 10.20 pm

    I have a baby Koel in my garden, being raised by pee wees. He is gorgeous. Though I do feel for the pee wees, as they are about a third his size, and he is forever hungry, and demanding food. I’m sure the pee wees are very proud of their adopted baby, but will be relieved when he heads off on his migration to the North.
    All you Koel haters out there need to loosen up. Learn to love them. They have selected your tree to sit in, which is an honor. And they are only here for a short time each year. So just get over it. Their call is a beautiful love song. See it for what it is and enjoy it.

    Reply

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      26 December 2016 at 9.14 am

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      Reply

  38. Annette

    14 February 2006 at 9.13 am

    I have this very annoying wattlebird that comes to my garden every bloody morning, and throughout the day, giving the most horrible call and it is making me go cuckoo. I am now considering making my own sling shot and putting on my cat suit and doing leopard crawl across my back garden and shooting the f@#%*r. Please help, does any one know how to get rid of this little devil bird? Me running out in my white gown shouting all sorts of swear words is not helping my sanity, especially at 5:30 am every morning!!!!! I need some sleep!!!!

    Reply

  39. Linda Gutierrez

    8 March 2006 at 2.37 am

    I don’t know what kind of bird is outside my window but I do know I would like for it to go away any suggestions anyone plese!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Reply

  40. Vid

    28 April 2006 at 1.46 am

    I was in Mumbai, India the past 2 weeks. This koel started every night at 2.30 and build a crescendo of calls. In fact the bird lost its voice at the higher notes, but started allover agin until it spluttered. It just would not give up from 2.00 am to 6.00 am. Ruined my holiday. I would gladly machine gun the thing. Hope its call for a mate went unanswered. Where is bird flu when you need it.

    Reply

  41. ALE

    19 May 2006 at 1.49 pm

    How do you get rid of the annoying things. Someone please!
    I need some sleep!

    Reply

  42. TDH

    22 June 2006 at 8.32 pm

    I have the annyoying bird problem too, every morning at exactly 3am it starts and it goes strong for hours, it’s so bad it wakes me up out of my sleep! That is until I downloaded the The Wedge Tailed Eagle sound. Whenever the noise starts I crack the window and play the sound on my laptop and the noise stops cold!! Thanks for the tip, now I’m in control!!

    Reply

  43. tayler

    2 August 2006 at 6.54 am

    I am having a lot of problems with neighbours chooks and ducks coming over to my home leaving there droppings constantly on my back pagola if anyone is out there that knows how to or what liquids substances that chooks dont like with out harming them i would really be greatfull as this is problem is really driving me up the wall and is so discusting having to clean each day

    Reply

  44. concerned turkey keeper (aka tayler)

    2 August 2006 at 7.02 am

    is anyone out there who may be able to help me i live in the country and have a huge turkey for some strange reason this bloody turkey runs after the kids next door and has even pecked out one of them and drew blood i need to know how i can have this turkey stop as i am scared it may soon turn and seriously hurt the other children includinga 2 year old toddler please if anyone is out there who can give me any advice please do so it would be much appreciated.

    Reply

  45. john

    4 August 2006 at 12.26 am

    Turkey slap it !

    Reply

  46. Gull

    20 August 2006 at 11.53 am

    So what about the wattlebirds, where the f*ck did these come from…. two years of insanity, forays into the first light in the jocks to sling whatever into the trees, ear plugs, cutting down trees, the kids even call it the “Pesky” bird.
    Got the slug gun and bagged the 14th one this morning, yep, HUGE satisfaction. But still they come…. Take up arms and wipe them out.

    Reply

  47. eagleclaw

    22 March 2008 at 12.25 pm

    THE BIRD MUST DIE
    ive got a different problem I thought i was being haunted by an owl which has an omnidirectional bass laden hoot. It has also been ruling my life as the pitch is so low it can even penetrate ear plugs and 2 foot thick walls ( i bought a church in a pristine country site and my paradise has turned into a nightmare) (choking on my own rage so xcuse the rant and writing) Because i thought it ws a native owl i had to respect its teritory and live with it. HAAAHA I have just found out it is a filthy, stinking, disease ridden PIGEON. So now the ball is in my court. 1 Slug Gun comming up bye bye pigeon
    I fantasize about going to hunt it and cook it but ill probably just kill it and move on
    I have also thrown my shoulder out and lost a shoe, a mop and several cds
    PS i love all the birds in my area as most are navive parrots etc and i mean no other harm to any other thing in the world
    thanks for listening fellow sufferer

    Reply

  48. Amanda

    26 August 2008 at 6.43 pm

    My hubby and i are in Glen Waverley and we absolutely HATE the stupid bloody wattle bird. It swaks with an ear peircing Kwaa-Kwaa-Kwaa-kwaa followed by a few seconds of a soft coo-ing sound, then just as our lsleepy brains relax….KWAA-KWAA-KWAA again. Worse still….it starts in August at 6am and gets earlier and earlier by a few minutes each day until he’s waking us up at 4;30 am in end of september. Then we have to put up with it till he stops in about November. have tried windchimes, throwing things at trees (random trees as i can never actually spot the little shit) and generally screaming things, on the street, in my pj’s. Nothing works. Love most animals….HATE this stupid, sleep depriving waste of space. Also dislike person’s suggestions we be nice to it and feel honoured that it chose our tree. Insane. Wish i could feel that way!
    Good to get that frustration out as most people don’t know what we’re talking about (and we talk about the bird A LOT!)

    Reply

  49. kent gilbert

    7 September 2008 at 11.21 am

    ooooohh my GOD! i hate this bird, it sits outside or bedroom window and every day at 5am it starts its annoying call. my girlfriend and i take it in turns at throwing rocks at the tree every morning. our bird sounds more like a pickledy-pickeldy sound but the picture is definately it. i am so happy that there are other people out there that feel my pain.
    got alot of joy from this site.

    Reply

  50. daniel

    15 September 2008 at 11.06 pm

    Hi guys and girls, this will most likely solve your problem, go down to jaycar and buy a variable strobe light ($27.00) and a 240volt timer ($29.00) and an extension lead from bunnings ($30.00) Set up the strobe pointing up the tree, and about 3-4 metres from the ground, set the timer from 4 – 6 every morning or whenever the bird annoys you. This works and you will get beautiful sleep. Sometimes the bird will challenge the strobe but will only stay a couple of minutes. I have tried this and worked wonders.

    Reply

  51. Red Wolf

    25 September 2008 at 7.04 pm

    There’s always this option.

    Reply

  52. foxfoxyfox

    29 September 2008 at 9.44 pm

    Since this bird has arrived my wife thinks I have developed Tourettes Syndrome thanks to the little F##ker. I live under the flight path, near a road and have a crying baby next door and disco loving neighbours at the back. None of this annoys me but this bloody bird DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE. Reminds me of the bully on The Simpsons that goes HAH HAH

    Reply

  53. Guy Harris

    1 October 2008 at 4.48 am

    I’m close to burning the fucking tree down. Its 10 to 4, he’s been going for about an hour already. I can hear his friend going about a block away. Just fly the fuck over to him. I’m just gonna get a mates air rifle and start popping the shit out of them. I couldn’t even kill a rat, but this thing is gonna be riddled with slugs after I shoot him out of the tree, locate the carcus, and just continually shoot it until I’m satisfied.
    Might hang him up in the tree as a warning. Or put his head on a spike or something.

    Reply

  54. Don Gillies

    5 October 2008 at 5.12 pm

    Thanks Daniel for your advice on the 15 9 2008. It has worked for us even though we are 200 mtrs away from the tree. It sure is great to get 8 hours sleep again. Thanks again Daniel. Go get your strobe light ladies & gents. It works.

    Reply

  55. Julie

    7 October 2008 at 2.42 pm

    We’re thinking of using the strobe light. Is it OK to use in a typical suburb, won’t break any council laws, or whatever? We have a wattlebird in a tree in our small garden, arrives at 5.20 am and makes an awful racket, like a tuneless trumpet! Am slightly delirious from lack of sleep most days, as I don’t cope well on less than 8 hours. Trying to get to bed at 9pm to deal with it, but annoyed how much it affects my routine and health every October for a few months. Feel v. sorry for those with the koel etc. at 2 – 4 am. I thought 5.20 am was bad, but thats shocking! Hope you find the solution.

    Reply

  56. Red Wolf

    7 October 2008 at 5.30 pm

    Provided the strobe light isn’t directed at a neighbour or disturbing anyone, I wouldn’t think it was a problem. But if you do have complaints, explain why you’re doing it. I can’t imagine too many people willing to put up with Common Koels all night

    Reply

  57. Rick

    9 October 2008 at 11.35 pm

    Ah so that’s the f****r that is haunting me. Started a few days ago. A koel huh, and we have to put up with it until February. This one has a verse. You just know when he does one part, he will do parts one and two. I found a wav file and it is definitely the one, just with a little tune to go with it. To make it worse, we do not have A/C upstairs so have been leaving the windows open as it gets hotter. Was hoping he was lost and would not come back but it seems he has chosen the tree out the back for his holiday. The tree overhangs our small backyard but isn’t our tree so I can’t even do anything about it. Sounds like the wedge tail eagle download is the way to go.
    Thanks for giving me a laugh folks. I’m praying I can do something about it least I lose the plot like half of you!

    Reply

  58. Richard Wahroonga

    13 October 2008 at 2.26 pm

    I feel so much better having read all the comments above…I have been going mad with this fucking nightmare Koel bird….I wondered why the little beach house we bought was such a good price but soon found out why…from 3 am to whenever…it penetrated earplugs and pillows…every night. I just got back and need another weeks holiday. The noise is bad enough…what drives me insane is that there is a silent gap of 20 seconds every time….just enough to get back to sleep…ish…before starting again. All ideas are good but a shotgun has to be favourite with this bastard.

    Reply

  59. Stick

    14 October 2008 at 6.19 pm

    Great posts, feel much better. Rex & Kerko 15/11/05, I couldn’t put it better.
    Peter Shooter 11/02/06 must be delusional from lack of sleep, else his name gave him the solution.
    These bastard birds are brood parasites – they lay the eggs in other birds’ nests & when the chick hatches it dumps the other eggs or out competes for food so they are not to be loved.
    I’ll try combining suggestions of Brad 27/11/05 & Daniel 15/09/08, otherwise the slug gun is on its way.

    Reply

    • Heer

      12 May 2017 at 3.48 pm

      Ya someone please shoot Peter shooter out of this forum..he doesn’t belong here…nobody should put up with ANY kind of parasites..be it piegeons or koels or cuckoos or hynas or anything that is troublesome..it even Peter shooters who sympathise with troublemakers..

      Reply

  60. Steve

    20 October 2008 at 2.36 pm

    I had to laugh whilst reading this….the laugh of a sleep deprived tormented madman. I have a wattle bird that’s been waking me up at stupid o’clock every spring morning for the past couple of years. I HATE the f*cking thing. If I could walk into a shop and buy an air rifle, I’d do it today.

    Reply

  61. Angela Melb 3087

    1 November 2008 at 7.08 pm

    I have lived in my new home for almost a year – low and behold if I am not traumised as of late then I am not sure what I am, all I know is I have installed a roller shutter to the main bedroom and I now would like to fit all the windows with these comodoties – just so I can damn well shut out the noise and disturbing at that from all these raging birds…Helppp : /

    Reply

  62. Angela Melb 3087

    1 November 2008 at 7.12 pm

    Yes traumatised that is…umm would any know where I could score an air rifle hmmm?

    Reply

  63. Lee

    3 November 2008 at 11.52 am

    We live in Melbourne & have our own little slice of feathered hell in the form of a wattlebird in a tree outside our bedroom. At 5.30am starts up “wah-a-a-a, wah-a-a-a, wah-a-a-a” like some demented tourettes victim (no offence to tourettes sufferers). After a couple of mornings of me rushing out half-naked & cavorting around clapping my hands, he just moved to the other tree in our front garden, about 10 metres away. One morning I had one in each frickin’ tree having a fine old jam session! I am a massive animal/bird/anything-but-spiders lover, & used to love wattlebirds, but I swear if I could throttle the thing, I’d happily do it. It has helped a lot to know we’re not the only ones being tortured!

    Reply

  64. Silvia

    10 November 2008 at 4.16 pm

    I think the Common Koel is an Australian Native bird that migrates to Indonesia during our winter and comes back in Spring. Now doesn’t that make you all feel better that it’s a Aussie?? It’s also supposed to prefer the nests of Wattlebirds, so maybe it’s the Koel in the Wattle nest and not the poor old Wattle that’s driving us all nuts. I downloaded the birdcall posted by Bleary Eyed (26/10/08) and I played it real loud and HEY, the monster Koel stopped his noise and fled. Thanks Bleary!!

    Reply

  65. INSOMNIAC

    15 November 2008 at 2.20 am

    Greetings my fellow Koel victims.
    Slivia, i can’t see the ‘Bleary Eyed’ audio file post, where can I get that sound?.
    I have tried everything else with this devil bird, it seems to have no fear of humans Just sits in tree squarking. What does it want???

    Reply

  66. Red Wolf

    15 November 2008 at 5.44 am

    You’ll need to scroll up a bit for the Bleary Eyed comment.
    That post referenced the Channel-Billed Cuckoo rather than the Common Koel. Both pages have linked MP3s of the bird’s call.
    I guess if the Koel doesn’t sod off when it hears another Koel, you can always try to scare it with the call of the much bigger Cuckoo. Good luck

    Reply

  67. Anonymous

    20 November 2008 at 4.47 pm

    Ok, so we have this stupid flipping Koel bird in the trees around our house too!!
    We’ve nicknamed him ‘Nigel Bird’ – since he always seems to be calling out and getting no answer lol…..
    He drives us absolutely insane!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    I was actually up with him at 4am this morning due to his bloody stupid annoying call………….doesn’t he have anything better to do??????? I mean come on, its 4am!!! I think i layed there in my bed for about an hour trying to get to sleep……..
    Every single afternoon we get home and he’s there waiting……..its like hes out to annoy you on purpose! And he never stops!! He gets louder and louder and louder everytime he calls…….and its quite funny when he loses his voice from calling out so much lol…..
    Anyways i think i’ve rambled on about this bird for way too long so…….

    Reply

  68. scott @ Oatley

    2 December 2008 at 8.48 am

    THis is very funny and relieving to hear that we are not the only ones to have this crazy bird singing at 4pm every morning. I too would like to se it fall dead from the tree in a plume of feathers…but there is a lot of them around so would be a bit of a mission…thanks to whoever put the audio file link (which opens in quicktime for anyone who cant listen to it) Why dont people write what suburb they live in on there comments? that way we can meet people in our area and then maybe have some sort of group that can go to council to ask for help??? I live in oatley in sydneys south, be great to hear from others… good luck…

    Reply

  69. Stick

    6 March 2009 at 9.19 pm

    New Solution – download the audio file of a wedge tailed eagle or hawk (see Brad 27/11/05) to your i-pod, then buy an i-pod Alarm Clock (just released at JB Hi-Fi for around $50) & set the alarm to start your i-pod at eg 4:00am. Set it up out of the weather away from your window – you don’t need to get up & won’t be woken (hopefully). Can’t wait ’til Spring to try it.

    Reply

  70. justic

    4 June 2009 at 7.05 pm

    Just get some earplugs and stop wishing to kill the stupid bird.. its just horny at night so it calls every 24/7. Earplugs people, they work to muffle that bullshit! invest in some.

    Reply

    • Heer

      12 May 2017 at 3.53 pm

      Putting earplug is like shutting your self to a problem..face the problem and not run away from it..and no..the ear plug dint help me AT ALL

      Reply

  71. Ray

    9 September 2009 at 8.17 am

    The wedge tail eagle audio file didn’t work for me . Has anyone got any other suggestions?

    Reply

  72. Red Wolf

    9 September 2009 at 8.40 am

    Try grabbing an audio file from Big Volcano

    Reply

  73. i hate wildlife

    17 September 2009 at 5.54 am

    there has to be a way i can kill this bird its a wattle bird every morning around 3:30 to 6:30 this fucking thing wakes me up i have resorted to chopping down the grayvilla it eats from and i plan on poisoning the bird feeder I WILL WIN damn any tree humping animal lovers out there!

    Reply

  74. Grigori

    5 October 2009 at 1.17 pm

    Hey guys – I just found this page after searching for “annoying birds SA”. I am relieved in that I am not the only one who suffers, yet I feel for yaz all. About 6 years ago I was attempting to finish an important essay, when a ‘tweeter’ appeared on my fence and since then the bloody things have spread so that in spring all the trees out the back and in the front have these damned things in them. They are the offspring of a noisy honey eater of some kind a medium sized, grey-brown bird with some yellow on it. The adults are noisy pipe with one of the loudest calls I’ve ever heard every dawn, they have driven away a lot of other birds we used to see around. But the babies are the worst, they stay in the tree near my window and call all day from sunup to sundown to be fed. It’s a constant tweet-tweet-tweet and its friggin loud. I too am going to invest in the air rifle solution and cull the bastards right back. These things do spread and i throw sticks and things but it never shuts them up for longer than a few minutes.

    Reply

  75. liz

    13 October 2009 at 4.44 pm

    I am about to shoot myself in the fucken head! This stupid bloody storm bird (koel) drives me fucken crazy!!! Its literally driving me out of my house. I need help please, anybody, if i get my hands on it, i will make it suffer in a big way!!

    Reply

  76. Indian Myna Hater

    23 October 2009 at 4.12 pm

    I still have some penny bungers left over from the 70’s. A good shanghai, some help from the missus to light the bunger then launch in time for the bunger to get close to the cuckoo, it pisses off very fast after that. Then I can get on with trapping and killing Indian Mynas

    Reply

  77. Brad

    3 November 2009 at 1.46 pm

    Guys this is the link below to the eagle sound, this works for me with the Koels around my house. I open up my windows, turn my computer speakers up full volume, and play this 5 or 6 times. Its amazing, instantly, all the birds in the area go silent! For hours! Note that the file format is AU format so you need to download Quicktime from Apple.com to be able to play it
    http://pelotes.jea.com/AnimalFact/Birds/eagle.au

    Reply

  78. Julie

    10 December 2009 at 5.52 pm

    I first posted a year ago. We’ve had a wattlebird driving us mad every October, for the last 3-4 years here in Melbourne. Its now December and we’ve been woken at 5.20 am every single morning since Oct. Really sick of it. We got the strobe and it worked well for a couple of days, then the bird just moved to another tree. It seems we’d need multiple strobe lights pointed at different trees, in order for it to work. Will be trying the eagle sound on an ipod timer next. Don’t know if that works for wattlebirds, but will try it. I wish the council could allow us to trap it or something. We’re in an inner suburb, Balwyn, and this thing is as loud as a rooster, yet it seems there’s nothing we can do about it. Perhaps moving to a house with no trees in the garden is the only answer.

    Reply

  79. Lyn

    15 December 2009 at 3.03 pm

    At 3.30am this morning I found this site and was reassured I was NOT alone being sent totally CUCKOO by the bloody Koel!! Last Christmas I could be found outside at 4am in my nightwear trying to shut the thing up before it drove our guests away. Thismorning I tried playing the cooee call but it just sat in the tree and answered back..ignored the eagle call!! I have the hose hooked up to a BIG pump today and tonight plan to BLAST it right out of the tree!! I also have a strobe light ordered!! SOMETHING has to work before Christmas guests arrive!! Has ANYONE had permanent success in ridding their garden of this creature. We live in the country and so it has MANY trees to settle in but WHY does it pick one close to the house. It is a big tree so too hard to attach an eagle kite too.

    Reply

  80. Toby Sydney

    9 September 2010 at 11.16 pm

    Yep the bird is back in sydney …..LOL at the frustration on here

    Reply

    • Tracie

      1 November 2010 at 3.41 pm

      I don’t think I have ever HATED anything in my life so much as I hate the mongrel fucking Koel bird!!!!!! Suffered through 5/6 months of the feathered asshole’s loud, foghorn squawking last year, and now its started yet again in the tree across the road. Making my life a total misery, same as last year. I don’t think I can bear it! From 2am in the morning right through to 8am when I leave for work, tired as all hell – I mean doesn’t it ever shut up?? Sleep time is now a constant personal nightmare. My only joy is thinking up things I would do to it if I could catch it. Like holding it down, and grinding its voicebox and throat into the ground with a good pair of stilettos!! Ah I can picture the sense of satisfaction now!

      You’d think the stupid people across the road (whose tree the mongrel is in) would do something about it – maybe they’re one of those lunatics who actually enjoy the sound – WTF!

      Going to do the CD’s in the tree thing tomorrow on my day off, and hope to God it improves the situation – otherwise I’m off to Dial-A-Sniper…….

      🙁

      Reply

      • DoulaMum

        20 October 2013 at 7.44 am

        Oh my stars! Reading your post felt like you were reading my own thoughts! I was laughing so hard because I can relate, then I started bawling because I’m so fecking sleep deprived I cry at the drop of a hat!! I’ve now had a month of three hours sleep a night and I am more than over that noisy annoying little bastard! This is the second year he’s graced us with his presence – after last years torture we had his tree cut down – only this year he has moved across the road to our neighbours giant frigging tree, and the neighbours refuse to do anything because they LIKE the noise! There are no fruit bearing trees here so I have no idea what the attraction is for him – he just sits in that tree repeatedly calling for 90% of the day.
        My room is under our house, insulated by besser brick walls, I wear industrial ear plugs and I can still hear the fecking little shit calling until around 11pm then starting up again at 2 or 3am! Like you, the only brief glimpse of relief comes from imagining various ways to end the life of this evil bastard. This mornings efforts had me pleading with my husband to blast him away with both barrels, who cares what the neighbours will say!
        I may or may not have supported my sons in their requests to build slingshots recently – but they’d have to be a bloody good shot to hit him where he currently hides out. They’ll start practicing today…………..

        Reply

  81. It feels so good…. | [ One Nice Day ]

    18 September 2011 at 5.43 pm

    […] Apparently, in Australia, people are facing similar issues: http://external-brain.redwolf.com.au/2003/12/18/annoying-bloody-birds/ […]

    Reply

  82. KateM

    18 January 2013 at 10.11 pm

    My idiot bird like the grevillia tree.. not sure if it is the bird you are talking about. It makes a dah-dah dah-dah sound, the first dah higher than the other… perfectly 5am every morning and for about half an hour.. just long enough to make you wide awake and shuts up when I need to get up… I hate the birds!!! They have all day to make their horrid noises…!!!! The cockatoos only swing by once a week, the grumpy crappy crow drones on, the magpies stamp on the colorbond roof and this darn waste of space sits in the tree behind my bedroom and makes a penetrating noise that resinates throughout the entire house, through A/C, fans, sealed windows, shutters, ear plugs and the lot!!! Seriously like the man before I will start throwing shoes soon.. .I dread going to sleep…!!!! I might try sleeping in the living room – PS The plastic owl doesn’t work and when you do scare him off in your pjs at 5am, he just moves to the tree next door…! I HATE WILDLIFE!!!! I need sleep!!!

    Reply

  83. darkinvaderdoomirken

    26 March 2013 at 2.37 am

    the bastards keep making noises outside when my wife me and my baby r sleeping the bastards noise every night and day im sick and tired of hearing them wishing i had a shotgun 2 kill those noisy bastards and also i will be strangling their necks 2

    Reply

  84. Goldstein

    22 April 2013 at 10.30 am

    I just cannot understand why some people actually WANT to attract birds into their neighbourhoods – as a young child, around 40 years ago, I wasn’t hearing these bastard birds, just quiet sparrows mostly then – now thanks to these cretins planting the ‘right’ trees etc and ‘attracting’ birds I am constantly woken by hordes of magpies, wattlebirds, constantly coo-ing wood pigeons, magpies fighting wattlebirds, starlings going off at whatever – all shitting on my car… and being South Australia, if I even attempted to use a slug gun to waste a few of them I’d quickly have SWAT police and PolAir shooting, or just arresting, me – no BBs or slugs allowed unless on a bloody farm or shooting range here.. ahh the glorious WAAKKAK WAAKKAK of the Little Wattle Bird is in my ears as I type.. now a Magpie is sounding off at it.. the day’s bird wars have started, only interrupted by the lonely bastard Bichon frise/Poodle cross nest door.. somebody kill me..

    Reply

  85. darkinvaderdoomirken

    23 September 2013 at 1.51 am

    the annoying chirping bastards wakes me up every 7 6 am in the morning those chirping sons of bitches needs to go exctinct like the dinosaurs and the dodo birds 2 mother nature is a real bitch letting the chirping fuckers wake people up early mornings killing their sleep that is why people are insane not enough sleep all because the chirping shits and annoying pesky assholes wake people up never good for sleep and sanity they deserve to die die die die die and never popular again we want them 2 die out and dead and exctinct and have their motherfucking chirping beaks blased off with bird riffles and painful bird trappings too they work to kill the ungreatful chirping bitches plus i call bird terminators and exterminators and pest control to have the annoying chirping assholes killed and we will cook their dead bodies in the oven and eat them with gravy and croutons like thanksgiving dinner

    Reply

  86. Andrew

    9 November 2013 at 8.34 pm

    The common koel has been waking me up at 3.00 in the morning, it is a very annoying bird to get rid of. Buy a hawk app from the App Store if you have an Apple phone, the sound of a hawk call will scare it away. This is an Aboriginal trick and it works!

    Reply

  87. Jenny Oxley

    11 November 2013 at 3.43 pm

    I swear to god if I don’t get rid of this fucking storm bird I will go crazy. Thinking about getting the bloody tree chopped down or poisoned. Meanwhile have to sleep with earplugs to sleep past 4am. Day at work yes so fucking slow. HATE them 🙁

    Reply

  88. Jenny Oxley

    11 November 2013 at 3.45 pm

    Fucking bastards, want to blast the shit out if then. Sick of wearing earplugs to bed so don’t get woken up by the bastards at 4am, hate the pricks

    Reply

  89. haddles

    22 November 2013 at 5.24 am

    I’ve written to National Parks to see if they can remove this ridiculous animal before I do something stupid. I was out at 3am yelling at it the other night and it just got louder. I think it’s defense is to annoy predators away. I shone a torch at it as I’ve heard that this works and it started calling even louder and more frantically.
    This evening I went to super cheap and got a million candle power floodlight and I’ll see if that works.
    Problem is I don’t want it to move on, if much prefer it dead. I have visions of its crumpled body in my wheelie bin barely alive and still making that horrible call in a last ditched attempt to find a mate.

    Reply

    • phil

      13 September 2014 at 6.23 am

      I too have the same bird here. It comes to my deaf neighbours tree at 445am every single morning and squawks ” kak-kak kak-kak kak-kak kak-kak kak-kak….” it goes on and on.. only pausing momentarily to take a breath.

      Even though its in my neighbours yard its only about 5 mtrs from my closed bedroom window. It sounds like its right next to my ears. Like a jack hammer.

      Ive tried ear plugs, headphones, yelling at it, throwing things at it, shining torches at it, hosing it and I even bought a stupid plastic statue of a hawk and put it on the fence…but the bastard bird worked out it was fake and sat next to it squawking 🙁

      Slug guns are illegal here (australia) but I would gladly use one on this damn thing. Its been going steady this morning since about 445am. Now its 615am and although it has slowed down (now that im wide awake again) It is still there…still going kak-kak kak-kak kak-kak kak-kak kak-kak.

      I considered hanging cds but it starts before the sun is even up. It’s pitch black darkness. Plus I can’t reach into neigbours trees from the fence. Its just outta reach.

      There seems no way to stop this bird. It’s causing me to be angry every day and massively sleep deprived. I’m tired at work and it’s affecting my private life.

      I feel like seriously dousing the trees with fuel and watching them burn…no trees..no bird 🙂

      I can’t even get a sling shot here (nsw, australia) make everything illegal, except being driven to madness 🙁

      HELP !

      Pj

      Reply

  90. Floyd

    30 December 2013 at 8.01 pm

    I am so glad I am not alone, and the collective rage here is encouraging.
    I just played the wedge-tailed eagle sound on my laptop in my backyard and the $@#*$% stopped calling and a very short time later flew off to some spot further away. Thank you to the people who posted this suggestion. It is a sanity saver. Unfortunately, I fear that that things flew into the direction where a colleague of mine lives – might be in for some grumpy work environment. 🙂
    http://www.bigvolcano.com.au/sounds/wteagle.wav

    Reply

  91. geoffrey101

    28 November 2014 at 12.36 pm

    I hate the bloody things wish I had a big shotgunnnnnnnnn

    Reply

    • TIRED AUSSIE

      28 November 2014 at 6.27 pm

      Yes, it is never ending. I have done mossie coils that worked at 1st. Auto sprays that worked at 1st. Spraying tree with fly spray worked at 1st. Did some santa snow past few wks. Now, finally also I have it worked out that I hav my auto spray in a faulty mode I guess it is. The red light keeps blinking AND a fleuro stick which will last a few days. Just take it inside in the mornings..
      U MUST PLACE THEM IN DIFF SPOTS IN THE TREE EACH NIGHT SO THEY DONT GET USED 2 THEM BEING IN THE ONE PLACE AND FEEL NO THREAT. GUESS THEY MAY THINK THE FLEURO STICK IS A SNAKE AND THE AUTO SPRAY RED FLASHN LIGHT A BIG BIRD BLINKING. HAVE HAD PEACE 4 WKS DOING THIS. NOT MUCH EFFORT. JUST, PLACE THEM IN THE BRANCHES U CAN REACH. TAKE EM INSIDE IN THE MORNING, THEN PLACE THEM DIFFERENTLY WHEN U GO 2 BED. AS IT IS XMAS I AM GETTING A SML SET OF BATTERY OPERATED LIGHTS. FLEURO STICKS ARE CHEAP FROM DOLLARS AND CENTS AND LIGHTS ETC

      Reply

  92. WTF BIRD???

    31 March 2015 at 7.57 pm

    I currently do my internship in Mumbai, I am here for 5 months, and this f.ing bird is killing me. It drives me crazy. I am losing it. It makes me aggressive and keeps me from sleeping. If I had the chance, I would kill this damn thing straightaway. I use earplugs and listen to music. Anyway, this is no long-term solution. I wonder how the next 4 months are going to be like, I guess it’s impossible to get accustomed to this freak of nature.

    Reply

    • TIRED AUSSIE

      1 April 2015 at 12.55 am

      Geoffrey, get some sort of blinking light in the tree. I did write this suggestion in one of my posts and it stopped the c…
      it is unbearable. Shdnt b allowed. Wish i were in mumbai. Did service project in 86 4 girl guides 2 india and bangladesh.
      Loved it. Lost contact with all my special friends over the yrs. Was a g

      Reply

    • TIRED AUSSIE

      24 May 2015 at 11.16 pm

      Hows it goin with the trauma of the bird that destroys yr very being. Makes u lose yr mind. Makes u mental. I hav given advice 2 put a blinking light in the tree. After trying coils, incense, shiney things i found a blinking light 2 work. Must think it is being watched. Havent had it nearby 4 a long time now even after stopping useing the blinking lights. Hear it further away and my skin crawls. I HATE THOSE BLOODY BIRDS. CAUSED TRAUMA 2 ME HEAD

      Reply

  93. francis hape

    15 September 2015 at 5.43 pm

    SOLUTION: Purchase a laser light……the illegal ones that burn holes through cardboard…..(treat the light like a gun, don’t use it against humans and make sure its locked up away from kids)…..locate the motherfucka bird when it squarks…..it likes to hide “in the tree”………..turn the light on and aim……..if the bird is seen flying away with a trail of smoke in its wake, it won’t be back in a hurry…………….

    Reply

    • TIRED AUSSIE

      15 September 2015 at 6.28 pm

      DO NOT BUY AN ILLEGAL LASER. JUST PUT A FLICKERING LIGHT IN THE TREE AND IT WILL KEEP THEM AWAY. JUST PLACE IT IN THE TREE EACH NIGHT AND THEY WONT B THERE.

      Reply

  94. Cookie

    21 September 2015 at 9.31 pm

    Iloving all these comments. We are all decent people at the end of the day. But I’m angry. Really fucking angry. It’s the most annoying sound in the world. Remember when Jim carrey did the most annoying sound in the world? This is ten times worse. I’ve had to watch my wife (who usually looks pretty good in the morning), look like shit when she climbs onto the roof at six in the morning with some piece of shit water pistol we bought for our son six years ago screaming and shooting it sounding like one of the sand people from Star Wars. My neighbour then bought a new water pistol from target. Said it travels 12 metres. It was lucky to hit three. I m going to have to step it up a bit but I can’t find any tanks on gumtree. See you at five in the morning devil bird…

    Reply

    • TIRED AUSSIE

      22 September 2015 at 6.57 am

      Put a flickering light in the tree each night. They r back here as well so tis the season 2 b pissed off. TOTALLY!!! i tried coils, imcense etc. Worked at 1st but then the little bastards were getting more relaxed with the incense and singing even loiuder. FLICKERING LIGHT THEY MUST THINK ITS ANOTHER BIRD OR THREAT AND STAY AWAY. FLICKERING LIGHT I HAD A AUTO SPRAY THAT FLICKERED RED LIGHT. PUT IT OUT EACH NIGHT

      Reply

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